Baba
Girl donation
Are women like cattle, or sacks of cloth that people give as gifts at the time of marriage?
Note: This letter is only for those who have reverence for Sadguru Baba Shrii Shrii Anandamurti ji and try to follow His Ananda Marga ideology.
Namaskar,
Here is one important topic that every Ananda Margii must know about.
Sadguru Baba has given the guideline that males and females have equal status. But in old Indian traditions that is not the case. Especially, marriage ceremonies are done in a very lopsided way. This letter talks about the kanyadan (girl donation) Hindu marriage system. These days even highly educated boys and girls marry according to the old ritual of kanyadan or girl donation - whereby girls are donated to boys and treated as slaves. Those getting married do not think about what they are doing - nor do the participants / witnesses. They are so indoctrinated that they do not consider or question how abominable this kanyadan (girl donation) ritual is. To understand please continue reading.
Sadguru Baba says, “Renaissance people will have to start a movement for social equality and fight against such inequality based on sexual difference. Are women like cattle, or sacks of cloth that people give as gifts at the time of marriage? Are they slaves to be sold to others? As long as women lacked courage or intellect, they tolerated these things – but what a great humiliation! To submit them to such indignities is far worse than to whip them publicly on the road. Are women simply like bundles of cloth to be sent to the washerman’s house?” (1)
Girls objectified & given away as mere objects
In the below photo, the prevailing Hindu marriage dogma is on full display. Women are treated as mere objects to be donated to the husband and his family - just as one would donate a sheep, cow, or a table cloth etc. These girls are viewed as physical property to be bartered and traded etc. Verily, females in the Hindu marriage system are not treated as human beings, but rather as mere possessions - i.e. articles to be given away etc.
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It is akin to the era of slavery where slaves were taken to the market to be bought, sold, and traded like mundane possessions etc. Similarly, these girls are decorated in order to be given away. This is the case with typical Hindu marriage ceremonies. The Muslim marriage ceremonies are even worse as they proclaim that three females are equal to one male. That is why sincere Ananda Margiis do not participate in these types of dogmatic ceremonies - even if non-margiis are hosting the event. Participating means degrading the status of women. Indeed, this type of marriage ritual is abhorrent.
The below is the scene at a Hindu marriage / kanyadan (girl donation) ceremony where girls are objectified and bartered as property - just as one has a house, a car, a bicycle, horses, or animals etc.
~ Dogmatic Hindu marriage ceremony where females treated as commodities ~
Pictured above is the girl donation ceremony. In the above photo, the guardians of the girl are leaning over her head and offering her to the boy who is sitting across from her. The golden thread or cord that is looped about the girl and boy demonstrates that she now belongs to him. In India, girls are treated as property - just as one has a house, a car, a bicycle, horses, or animals etc. Boys are not treated as property, but girls are. This is pervasive in throughout the Indian subcontinent, the Muslim world, and many other regions as well. In the west, females were formerly treated this way but things have changed drastically in the last half-century whereby women have gained both legal and social rights. But in India - such as in the Hindu wedding scene picture above, girls are mere objects to be traded.
Because this dogma is so ingrained, some may feel frustrated reading this. They have been so indoctrinated into this defective mentality that they think the donation of their girls is something holy or virtuous.
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Quite humiliating and denigrating for the girl
The name of this social ritual is kanya’da’n (girl donation). Kanya’ means girl, and da’n means gift or donation. Thus when they donate their girls it is called kanya’da’n (girl donation). They think of this as being something virtuous. But in reality, we know that nothing can be donated unless it is something you own. Thus girls are mere commodities or property.
As Sadguru Baba points out, this whole scene is quite humiliating and denigrating for those girls but due to their ignorance they feel ecstatic and glorified during this ceremony. When that girl was small she was taught that a one fine day she will become the property of another family. So they believe that this is a respectful and dignified outcome - i.e. to live as the property of someone else.
Ananda Marga philosophy states, "The bride wearing ornaments would remain seated in a squatting fashion on a low wooden seat; the guardian of the bride would pick her up along with the wooden seat and give her away to the bridegroom, who would receive her as a gift. The person presenting the gift was called kukuda, that is, one who gives away [the bride after picking her up]. The one who received the gift was called koka, that is, the one who accepts the offered bride as a gift. This marriage custom where the daughter is ceremonially given away is still prevalent among high-caste people. This custom is humiliating for women. Is a woman a commodity like rice, pulse, salt or oil that I pick her up and hand her over to someone? Is a woman a hen or okra that I pack her up in a sack and sell her or give her away? The custom is not only humiliating for women; it also drags the dignity of humanity down to dust. It violates the basic principles of humanism and also Neo-Humanism. I request all rational-minded people of the world to give serious thought to this issue and try their best to abolish this odious custom. I would say that it was not proper for Manu to support this custom." (2)
Why margiis not to support dogmatic Hindu marriage kanyadan
This defective mentality is similar to that of a caged bird that has been caged for so long that it cannot conceive of its own freedom. It likes that small, puny cage.
In His below guideline, Baba is warning us about this kanyadan dogma: Females are not anyone’s personal property like cattle or sacks of cloth. Yet treating females as mere objects is worse than whipping them publicly on the road. Only a few confused or very new margiis participate in this dogmatic Hindu marriage ritual. Every true Ananda Margii is keen to refrain from attending any such type of event etc - sincere sadhakas understand they cannot support or attend this Hindu ritual of kanya’da’n (girl donation) ceremony. After all, these are not innocent affairs, but rather represent the imposition of dogma and the exploitation of women. It is our duty to educate the public and remove this social injustice and gender difference.
Baba is warning us about this dogma and it is our duty to educate the public and remove this social injustice and gender difference. Females are not anyone’s personal property. A few confused or very new margiis attend this dogmatic Hindu marriage ritual. But every true Ananda Margii must think long and hard before attending any such type of event etc - sincere sadhakas understand they cannot support or attend this Hindu ritual and kanya’da’n (girl donation) ceremony. After all, these are not innocent affairs, but rather represent the imposition of dogma and the exploitation of women.
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Ananda Marga philosophy states, “Renaissance people will have to start a movement for social equality and fight against such inequality based on sexual difference. Are women like cattle, or sacks of cloth that people give as gifts at the time of marriage? Are they slaves to be sold to others? As long as women lacked courage or intellect, they tolerated these things – but what a great humiliation! To submit them to such indignities is far worse than to whip them publicly on the road. Are women simply like bundles of cloth to be sent to the washerman’s house? Women must not be suppressed, and there should not be domination of males in the society. Society should have a cooperative leadership, not a subordinated leadership; there should be a coordinated, cooperative leadership, leadership between males and females. Renaissance people will have to start a movement immediately to fight against all these disparities; otherwise if fifty percent of the population, that is the ladies, remain downtrodden, how can there be all-round progress of human society? So these are all the social duties, the social responsibilities of the Renaissance movement. Renaissance people will have to wage war on these disparities, these inequalities – they will have to be rooted out of the society.” (3)
Conclusion
In order to save our universal human family from various dogmas and degrading traditions of ritualistic marriages, Sadguru Baba has graciously given an ideal revolutionary marriage ceremony that grants full respect and dignity to females and places them on equal footing as men. The Ananda Marga system eradicates all dogmas - no kanyadan (girl donation), no dowry, no casteism - and enables our human society to march forward into a whole new era of gender equality based on neo-humanistic values.
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Namaskar
in Him,
Sulekha’ Singh
References
1. A Few Problems Solved - 7, Renaissance in All the Strata of Life
2. Shabda Cayaniká Part 4, Disc: 27
3. A Few Problems Solved - 7, Renaissance in All the Strata of Life
* * *
The below sections are entirely different topics, unrelated to the above material.
They stands on their own as points of interest.
* * *
== Section 2: Prabhat Samgiita ==
Prabhat Samgiita Intro: This following song depicts how the arrival of Parama Purusa transforms the whole scene. In the flower garden the birds are singing more sweetly, and the bumble bees are whispering to the flowers about the arrival of Parama Purusa. In the clouds, rain, thunderstorms, there is an expression of joy and enthusiasm. Everything is charged with positivity. When the mind is in a blissful state with bhakti then everything looks beautiful. Here the bhakta feels that in the heart the most charming Parama Purusa has appeared and in result everything is dancing in ecstasy.
"Áj pákhirá kii gán gáiá jáy, phúlero vanete bhramará nibhrite,
kii kathá ájike shonáte cáy..." (Prabhat Samgiita #0364)
Purport:
O’ which songs do the birds keep singing today? In the flower garden, what does the bumble bee secretly wish to convey today? It looks like they are talking about the Supreme Charmer, Parama Purusa.
O’ why does the thunderbolt clamour with overwhelming joy in the heavy clouds amidst torrential rain showers. For whom is the thrilled lightning flashing with its bolts streaking across the sky. It looks like they are happy because Supreme Entity has come.
O’ who is sitting in my heart making my whole existence dance with ever new tunes. Today, I see the Lord appear before me in a beauteous and most attractive mohan form. He is full of mamata - extreme affection towards me. Seeing Him my heart is dancing...
Note For Prabhat Samgiita #0364:
Mamata': Mineness; In Sanskrit “mama” = mine, and the suffix ta’ = -ness; hence “mineness.” To have equal or more love for something / someone than one has for oneself.
Ananda Marga ideology says, "What is the meaning of “mamatá”? Mama + tá = mamatá. Mama means “mine” and thus mamatá is the inner idea of being mine, the feeling that something is my own." (1)
Ananda Marga ideology guides us, "“Mamatá” means “mine-ness” – “Mama” means “one's own”, and the abstract noun derived from it is “mamatá” – meaning, thereby “mine-ness.”" (2)
For example, suppose you are suffering from a fever then naturally you will be concerned about your own health. You will try to cure yourself by going to the doctor and taking medicine etc. If you have mamata for someone else, then if they are sick with a fever you will have the same degree of care for their condition as your own. When one does sadhana then this sense of mamata grows and one ultimately has the feeling of mamata towards the entire created universe. Without sadhana, one’s sense of mamata will be extremely limited whereby one might only care about their own individual existence. So when the mind is extremely narrow one only has mamata for oneself. Those with a slightly broader mind have mamata towards their parents and family members. And as the circumference of mind expands one has mamata for other relatives and community members etc. However, it is only with sadhana that the periphery of mind can grow further and further wherein one’s sense of mamata includes all beings and expressions of this cosmos. Parama Purusa has mamata’ for each and every entity - this entire creation, all living and non-living expressions.
References
1. Ananda Vacanamrtam - 7, The True Nature of Bhakti
2. Ananda Vacanamrtam - 1, Pleasing the Lord
== Section 3: Important Teaching ==
Multi-tasking: dangerous & impossible
The typical person has numerous aims. For example, they want to be the king, president, billionaire, film hero, sports star, musical icon etc. In that sense the average person is multi-purpose. But at the same time living beings are unilateral. We can only do one work at one time. People talk about multi-tasking, but it is an impossibility for unit beings. The mind cannot do two works at the same time. And if one tries to multi-task, their mind will become bifurcated and ultimately degenerated, and / or they will find themselves in a terrible accident.
Best is to do one task at one time. By cultivating that quality in sadhana humans become one with Parama Purusa.
By doing sadhana and with his grace, the aspirant does become one with Parama Purusa. And then, after losing their individuality, they can work multilaterally - i.e. in all directions. Till then, do not try and do many works at one time.
Only one direction, at one time
Ananda Marga ideology states, “Microcosm is multipurposive but its flow is unilateral. On the other hand, Macrocosm is uni-purpose but its flow is multilateral. There is no end to the desires of microcosm. Sometimes it desires fame and sometimes it desires money. But it can make itself travel at one time in one direction only. His mind cannot be simultaneously engaged in a book and in a football game. While reading, if he thinks of the football game his mind is diverted from the book. Similarly, he cannot enjoy the football game if in the football game he begins to think about his books. Hence, the flow of the unit is unilateral. It travels only in one direction, at one time, whereas Macrocosm is uni-purpose but multilateral. There is only one thought of Macrocosm and that is the well-being of all. This is His one sole purpose. Yet Macrocosm is a multi-lateral flow. He does many things simultaneously. He is feeding you, creating the world, making rivers, canals and birds. Everything is being created in His mind. Hence there is much variety in His mind.” (1)
Reference
1. Subhasita Samgraha - 18, Microcosm and Macrocosm
== Section 4: Links ==
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This email contains four sections:
1. PS #0364: Why birds keep singing today?
2. Posting: Girl donation
3. IT: Multi-tasking: dangerous & impossible4. Links
