Baba
This way some do
Namaskar,
I was doing what had become a common practice of the day amongst some acaryas: Leave town on the day of ekadashii and then arrive in the next place and announce to everyone that I had fasted the previous day, when in fact the night before the margiis had fed me a delicious "pre-fasting day" meal. This was the way things had developed in my WT life, unfortunately. I learned this "fasting technique" from my supervisor and had seen this ploy successfully carried out by some other Wts. Certainly many workers are doing their dry fasting sincerely, yet there remain some Wts who do not observe Baba's directive about regular fasting.
At first, I was too nervous about doing it, i.e. deceiving margiis about fasting. But, over time, I became accustomed to it. Until finally, it became very normal. I was doing it all regularly. So the night prior I took full belly at Rajuji's house and then headed off to my next destination. While on the train I slept some, read the parts of the newspaper that was circulating around our train car, and talked with some of the other travelers. In this way the time passed and my 4 hour journey was nearly complete.
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The train slowed as it approached the upcoming stop and finally came to a complete halt. I grabbed my bags and descended onto the platform. The margiis were expecting me. I looked up and down the platform, knowing that they were sure to come and greet me. I did not see anyone. Then from behind I felt a few tiny hands grabbing onto my gown. I turned around to see the shining and smiling faces of three young boys. These were Sinhaji's sons. I knew them well and their joyous presence meant that Sinhaji was also close by.
Arrival & eating at Sinhaji’s
In a moment, Sinhaji approached with folded hands and a warm look in his eye. I had been here just two months ago, and it was good to be back. Immediately, Sinha welcomed me and inquired about my health etc. And then the five of us went together to catch an auto-rickshaw in order to head to Sinhaji's house. Along the way the boys were silently looking at me the whole time, and Sinhaji and I talked about the news of the day. Plus we discussed various plannings for his unit such as talks, pracar programs, the upcoming PMSA event, and he gave me a summary about how things were going at the school.
Finally, as we approached the house, Sinhaji asked if I was fasting today or not. I told him that I had fasted the day prior. He was very happy to hear this as he said his wife was preparing a special meal for my arrival. And he said that he himself was fasting tomorrow, which I knew to be true. Because whenever, given the option between fasting on a Friday or a Saturday, then always Sinhaji would choose Saturday. He had told me this on earlier visits and I knew him to be sincere in his practice.
Anyway, once he understood that I had fasted yesterday, then when we entered the house, he said I should attend to my evening duties and sadhana etc, because dinner would be ready in a short while. So I arranged all my things accordingly etc, and sure enough in a short while the call came for dinner. And that night Sinhaji and I ate and spoke about all sorts of organisational dealings, financial arrangements, and I gave him all the news about where I had just been. In this way, the evening passed and soon we were off to bed.
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How I got exposed
The next day came and went quickly. As planned, Sinhaji did his fasting and I arranged my own food and attended to various inspections at the school and dealt with other affairs. And the day after I left for my new destination. That was a Sunday. My mind was feeling relaxed and I did not think twice about having played that fasting drama with Sinhaji. I figured it was good he fasted, and that what I do is my business and that is all. I consoled myself and justified in my mind that Wt life is tough. Often it is not even possible to get proper food so what is the harm in eating on fasting days. That was my excuse or justification for skipping fasting. So my mind was unaffected by the fasting drama as it had become a way of life.
Tragically, on Tuesday, one of the very elderly and senior margiis from Sinhaji's bhukti passed away. And margiis from all around came for the shraddha ceremony, including Rajuji. And that is when the whole thing leaked out. Because in passing, Rajuji and Sinhaji discussed various happenings, and they naturally talked about their recent visits with me, since it had only been a few days earlier that I had stayed with them both. And in their own way, it came to pass that Rajuji mentioned that his wife had prepared me a special pre-fasting day meal. And in response Sinhaji said that that was impossible because his own wife had prepared me a special meal for my post-fasting day. And within one or two sentences my whole drama got exposed - 100%. They understood that neither I fasted at Rajuji's house nor at Sinhaji's house. Rather, I had lied outrightly about the whole affair.
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CS Dada: You can skip fasting but do not deceive margiis
I came to know about all this because both Rajuji and Sinhaji are respected and senior margiis, and in an effort to straighten the situation out they talked to my chief secretary (CS), not my direct in-charge. Needless to say, CS Dada was very displeased with my behaviour; he scolded me saying, “If I wish to skip fasting then I should keep myself hidden in the jagrti and not play such dramas with the margii families.” Then he got even angrier and said, “This ruins the reputation of all acaryas.” We both knew well that most of the Dadas I come across regularly skip their fasting days. Some eat a large quantity of fruit and milk on fasting days.
The problem, as CS Dada put it, was that I had gotten caught and lost the faith of the margiis.
Conclusion: feelings of repentance & restoring trust
This whole incident caused me to reflect on what my life had become. I realised I had fallen, and felt that I should reaffirm myself to Baba's ideals. Ultimately, I want to follow 16 Points and do not wish to deceive anyone. Rather I aspire to become an acarya in the true sense of the term. And I thought writing this letter would help in this regard. So for this reason I have recounted this story, and by Baba's grace this will help me rectify my misdealing as I want to be sincere in 16 Points and become a model wholetime worker of Ananda Marga Pracaraka Samgha.
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In hopes of repairing my tarnished image and bad name, for a long time after this transpired, I would ensure I was at a margii's house at the time of fasting so I could fast in front of them. I wanted them to physically see that I was doing it properly. I could not live with them thinking that I just skipped all my fastings. So to prove myself, I always arranged to be with margiis on fasting day as a way of redeeming myself. This went on for months and months until I felt I had regained their trust and repaired my reputation.
Namaskar,
At His lotus feet,
Avt. Dada
Ananda Marga Caryacarya says, "On and around the times of new and full moon, one may observe that the gaseous and aqueous factors in the body rise up into the head and chest, creating an uncomfortable feeling. Therefore, if a person does not take food at these times, these factors will be drawn down from the higher portions of the body to the lower portions, thereby alleviating the uncomfortable feeling." (1)
Ananda Marga ideology guides us, "You should not depend on food too much. This is why I have prescribed fasting on four days a month for some people and two days a month for others, and personally I have proved by fasting for five years and ... months at a stretch that if people try, they can remain without food. If one's dependence on food decreases, one will gain more freedom in a particular aspect of life." (2)
Ananda Marga philosophy states, "So, fasting is a necessity in the eleventh moon, pu’rn’ima’, that is full moon, and new moon. In A’nanda Ma’rga, I didn’t prescribe these four days fasting, that is, for grhii’s — that is non-wholetimers, non avadhutas — they are to fast only two days, two eleventh moons. And for workers, avadhutas, they are to fast how many days? Four days. Because they will have to engage themselves more in spiritual and higher works, in intellectual and spiritual [realms]. That’s why they should fast four times in a month - and others, twice. But if others so desire, they may fast four times — I won’t say anything. But it is not compulsory. For them, two eka’dashiis." (3)
~ In-depth study ~
Here following are some of Sadguru's teachings related with this entire affair. By following the practice of regular fasting, one's entire body gets a chance to recuperate, thereby inviting better health.
Ananda Marga Yogic Treatments says, "During fasting the body's organs get a good rest, and the healing process is more rapid." (4)
Plus in this next quote Baba advises us how by fasting we will decrease our dependence on food and develop ourselves in other arenas.
Ananda Marga ideology guides us, "You should not depend on food too much. This is why I have prescribed fasting on four days a month for some people and two days a month for others, and personally I have proved by fasting for five years and eight months at a stretch that if people try, they can remain without food. If one's dependence on food decreases, one will gain more freedom in a particular aspect of life." (5)
Hypocrisy: deceiving others about dry fasting
Ananda Marga philosophy says, "To say, “I’m doing a dry fast” after having secretly drunk a glass of water is the height of hypocrisy." (6)
Ananda Marga philosophy states, "An honest person should never resort to hypocrisy in any sphere of life." (7)
Ananda Marga ideology teaches us, "There cannot be any hypocrisy in dhiiras. Hypocrites may be traders of religion, but the dharmic cannot be." (8)
Ananda Marga ideology guides us, "There is no place in a devotee’s life for hypocrisy – the devotee’s thoughts, words and actions will never be contradictory. These simple and straightforward people will say what they think and do what they say." (9)
Ananda Marga philosophy says, "No indulgence should be given to hypocrisy." (10)
Ananda Marga Caryacarya states, "Activities harmful to the Marga, hypocrisy, theft and the persecution of women are the greatest crimes. Such criminals should be categorized as mahápátakiis (great sinners) and severe measures should be taken against them from the beginning." (11)
Ananda Marga philosophy says, "In all spheres of life these days, people think one thing, say another thing, and do something entirely different. That is, hypocrisy is now at its peak." (12)
Ananda Vanii states "Struggle is the essence of life. Yours should be a pauseless struggle against corruption, hypocrisy and animality." (13)
Ananda Vanii states "Spread out the sermons of amity amongst the humanity. Remind one and all that the establishment of human excellence does not lie in hypocrisy but in simplicity and sincerity..." (14)
Repentance brings rectification
Ananda Marga philosophy says, "One is seized by a feeling of repentance when one realizes (either from within or with the help of a second person) the impropriety of one’s action." (15)
Ananda Marga ideology says, "Someone might have committed a pátaka [sin of commission], but after that wrong action feels repentance, and compensates for the harm his or her action caused. After such repentance and compensation, the action is no longer a sin. Suppose someone has stolen a thousand rupees from someone else. If after this theft the thief feels compunction and returns the money – better, however, with the inclusion of interest thereon – and begs forgiveness, that will mean that the person’s sin has been washed away. The person should no longer be called a sinner." (16)
Ananda Marga ideology teaches us, "If, knowingly or unknowingly, you have committed any mistake or any sin, then your repentance and your singing kiirtana, wholeheartedly, will free you from all sins. So, your future is always bright, never dark, never dark." (17)
Parama Purusa knows if you are fasting or not
Anyone who thinks they can eat on fasting day and get away with it is a fool. Because even if one tricks the margiis and even if one justifies the situation to himself, even then it is a guarantee that Parama Purusa will know what you did.
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Ananda Marga ideology guides us, "Parama Purus'a knows all the three phases of time: the past, the present and the future. Nothing is beyond the periphery of His supramundane knowledge...Suppose you eat something on the fasting day of Eka'dashii, thinking that perhaps Parama Purus'a will not know it. Certainly He will know about your secret eating, and He feels amused at what His little child is thinking. Not only the boys - the girls also make the same mistake. Perhaps on fasting day they eat chocolates and think, 'I am eating secretly - no one can see it.' This is defective thinking, because Parama Purus'a knows everything - nothing is hidden from Him." (18)
Ananda Vanii states, "Your ideal is represented by your conduct. Your learning, your social or economic status have nothing to do with your ideal." (19)
References
1. Caryacarya - 3, Procedure for Fasting
2. Ananda Vacanamrtam - 7, In Kali Yuga, Strength Lies in an Organized Body
3. 12/1/71 Patna
4. Yogic Treatments, Appendix
5. Ananda Vacanamrtam -7, In Kali Yuga, Strength Lies in an Organized Body
6. A Few Problems Solved - 6, The Spirit of Society
7. Liberation of Intellect - Neo-Humanism, Disc: 7
8. Subhasita Samgraha - 21, Nityánitya Viveka
9. Ananda Vacanamrtam - 7, How Should a Devotee Behave?
10. A Few Problems Solved -3, The Importance of Society
11. Caryacarya - 2, Society, Point #29a
12. Namah Shivaya Shantaya, Disc: 10
13. Ananda Vanii #11
14. Ananda Vanii #57
15. Ananda Marga Philosophy - 8, The Acoustic Roots of the Indo-Aryan Alphabet
16. Ananda Vacanamrtam - 9, “Take Refuge in Parama Puruśa with Unswerving Attention”
17. Ananda Vacanamrtam - 12, The Real Value of the Human Entity
18. Subhasita Samgraha - 12, The Secret of Dharma Lies Hidden in the Mind
19. A'nanda Va'nii #13
== Section: Important Teaching ==
How come worse than animals
Ananda Marga ideology guides us, “Human beings devoid of bhágavata dharma are just like animals. I have already said that if human beings lack bhágavata dharma they are actually worse than animals. Animals do not have a developed intellect or consciousness; human beings do. If human beings fail to utilize their developed intellect and consciousness, choosing to avoid the pursuit of bhágavata dharma, they are the enemies of humanity and a slur on the human race. Their actions, having no relation to bhágavata dharma, should be considered contrary to humanity and their innate characteristic. Their future is bound to be doomed, like that of a huge tree struck by lightning. The downtrodden masses who long to better themselves should embrace the path of bhágavata dharma. The easiest and most natural way for human civilization and humanity to grow is through bhágavata dharma. There is no other way. Hence, those who sincerely seek the welfare of humanity must uphold bhágavata dharma.” (1)
Reference
1. Ananda Marga Ideology & Way of Life, Bhágavata Dharma
== Section: Important Teaching ==
Why I need not ask You for anything
The next grade of devotee says: “As Parama Puruśa knows better than me about my own needs, why should I ask Him for anything? He knows exactly what I need for my development.” A mother knows more about the needs of her child than the child itself. When the child weeps, the mother instinctively knows that the child is feeling cold, for example, and covers its body with a blanket. The child stops crying immediately. Just as the child is dependent on its mother, human beings are dependent on Parama Puruśa. That is, “I know that You will surely do what is good for me. So why should I ask You for anything? It is meaningless, as You know better than me where my best interests lie.” So the higher-grade devotees do not pray for anything. Their simple approach is, “Parama Puruśa, please do whatever You think is best for me. All I want is to give You joy through my actions. And by giving You joy I shall also get joy. I act only to please You and thereby please myself. This is my one and only desire – I have no other interest.” This is termed rágánuga bhakti. Its spirit is, “I don't want anything. I only want to do Your work. I want to get joy by doing Your work, by loving You, by making You happy.” (1)
Reference
1. Ananda Vacanamrtam - 4, “Ye Yathá Máḿ Prapadyante”
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